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some place where i can say out my feelings...without showing my face...

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Walking Away ~

Sun, 12/06/2009 - 5:24PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 9 Views

copied from Mr. Tay blog..

very meaningful =)

 

 

To all the girls who make mistakes…
To all the guys who walk out…

Sometimes we all have our questions. We seek for answers and we don’t seem to find any. Was it meant so? Should we make mistakes again and again so that we finally would realize what we are doing wrong? Do we actually realize what we are doing to people who love us? Do we know what they feel? What can we see in their eyes? What does their smile tell us? Is their heart talking to us? Do we understand? Do we feel? Do we know? Do we want to know?

Sometimes things don’t work out the way we have hoped.
Sometimes we feel lost and confused.
Sometimes we make wrong decisions.
Sometimes… we hurt…
Sometimes… we don’t know that we hurt.

And sometimes it is too late to change things.

This article is for someone… someone like you or me, someone the next door, someone you know or someone you used to know. Read it and see if you can recognize yourself here.

When she got to know you, you were there to understand her mind.
When she liked you, you reached out and touched her heart.
When she loved you, you penetrated into her soul.
When she thought she had nothing, she always had you.

You were meant to be together, fate always wanted both of you to stay forever…

why are you holding back now?

Don’t we all make mistakes? Isn’t love there to teach us about forgiveness? Aren’t we here to fight for people we love? Is it so easy just to let go in order not to hurt your own ego?

She feels she is losing you. And it hurts. But more than that it hurts that you are not fighting to keep her.

Her…

The one who would rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else.
The one who would rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by herself.
The one who would rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart.
The one who wants you to hold her heart.

FOREVER...

When she first fell in love with you, she couldn’t stand being apart with you for a week, then it was a day, and then an hour, and then a minute. Now, she can’t bear being away from you for a second. Her heart aches when you are both not together and it means it aches constantly. She longs to be with you again, she longs to feel your touch; she wants to meet your glance once again and find there the answers to all her questions. She wants to fall helplessly into your arms, and have you hold her there, close to you, forever

she misses you a little … a little too much, a little too often, and a little more each day.

Sometimes I wonder if love is worth fighting for, but then I remember her and I have my answers.

Why are you crying now? Didn’t you know she loves you? Didn’t you know you are her life?

Just because you don’t see her tears doesn’t mean they aren’t there.

Just because she made one mistake it doesn’t mean she stopped loving you.

 

Once in a lifetime you become infatuated with a single soul. For this person you would do anything and not think twice about it. You will try your whole life to understand how is it possible that this person is affecting you this much, but you will never find out. And no matter what happens between you or how badly you fight … you will love this person without regret, for the rest of your life.

 

God made you and her and then He whispered, “Meant to be.”

But if you don’t see it now, it maybe a little bit late.

Because one day you’re going to wake up and realize that you truly love her.

And she is going to be waking up next to the guy who already knew.



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one more time ~

Sun, 11/29/2009 - 8:18PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 6 Views

sunday.....

book in day..

dont feel like going back to that dreadful place...

im sure everyone is feeling the same thing as me now..

tryin to cherish time at home, loved ones before going back...

those doing guard duty, i pity them...

not sure when im gonna book out..

mayb fri evening or something..

 

next sat...

how i wish can go out with her...

=(

i will try to sms her one more time..

if still no reply...

well...

算了吧 ~

maybe she isn't really the one i'm lookin for...

i thought she might be...

guess im thinkin too much...

when will my life be exciting and be filled with love ?

 

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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rainbow heaven ~

Sat, 11/28/2009 - 11:59PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 7 Views

life's been....quite sucky...

last weekend i went to race for SRR....

been awhile since i have went for dragonboat race...

the feeling came back, and it was shiok...

 

training in camp is getting tougher and tougher...

and thr is a saying, " When the Going gets Tough, the Tough gets Going..."

and i believe we will get tough....

went coy def last week....

endless digging for 48 hours...

super shagged..

luckily we only dug once in our lifetime...

whew....

next week its gonna be a relax week..

but the week after...

another outfield..

this time, its time to prove which company is the best....

after this test, its time to relax all the way till the end of the year !

cant wait...

but.....

when Jan comes....

our limits will be put to the test....

BRUNEI !

omg...

i really don't wanna go brunei...

hais...

 

my personal life, quite boring..

as usual...

only close friends like randy and nicholas knows what is my life about..

simply just lazing around on Earth..

aimlessly aiming for a goal...

for me,

my Goal was just to watch a movie with her,

sms-ed her,

didn't reply,

so what does that tell u ?

if she ain't interested, i guess i have to just forget about it and move on...

but everytime i see her, how am i going to avoid ?

anyw i bought a bdae present...

best part is, i don't even know when is her bdae...

she told me her zodiac sign was Sagittarius...

which is around this month till 21 dec..

all i wanted is just to meet her, pass her the present, watch New Moon, maybe have a dinner or something, then accompany home..

that's all...

is it so diffcult ?

i had everything planned...

and i think its was just wishful thinking...

all my life, i never had a date with a girl before..

just this...

just one experience of a date..

i would be happy..

but i think its not gonna happen..

in this lifetime....

 

 

Do it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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misguided ghosts ~

Sat, 10/17/2009 - 3:19AM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 3 Views
ok...

i really don't know how long i have not update this dusty blog already...

maybe cuz of boredom im here updating...

things have changed tremendously...

i have another friend who passed away..

again...

this time he was beaten up to death at China...

those heartless fuckers....

assholes...

hais...

i was really shocked and loss at words..

army is been.....ok ?

still surviving...

so i guess its not that tough..

its been 7 months since i was enlisted...

1 year and 5 more months to go...

hoping it will go pass fast...

Jan going brunei..

omg ~

RSM showed us the last mono video of their ex at brunei..

that is the most........ dont know what word is suitable for SHIT !

jialat i could say..

hais...

right now we are stayin at nee soon for 2 1/2 weeks...

cuz we conducting some competition...

after that we're moving back to our own camp..

and we are gonna start trg again...

1 month plus no field camp...

wonder how am i going to survive the next field camp...

oh yeah ~

i sprained my right ankle during the SOC test last tues..

and its quite bad...

worst so far...

swollen till its like a golf ball size ~.~

now i have status for 6 weeks..

skipping all the PTs..

fitness dropping already..

all i could is just chin ups and sit-ups..

ytd did 50 chinups...or more..

now my arms are cramping up...

its good also..

been awhile since i last felt cramped...

still remember the cramp-ness during the endurance test @ DB...

that is the worst...

anyw i gotten her number..

but i only like, sms her 2 or 3 times only ?

cuz i heard from someone that she is that kind of,

dont like to sms, or call ?

sian -.-

and also...

she doesn't like to meet her bf everyday...

cuz she finds it stress....or rather copped up..

like once a week only..

oh man ~

stuck at decisions whether should i continue to woo her..

some ppl say its worth it..

others... they say she is too old for me..

then i wonder....

should i ?

what attracted me to her was....

her beautiful smile...

will never forget how the way she smiles...

so...

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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spring cleaning ~

Sat, 08/29/2009 - 2:35AM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 7 Views
ages since i last clicked onto my blog..

and realised that my last post was my POP...

2 months after POP...

alot of things changed, happened

2 of my friends passed away...

totally speechless abt it...

wasnt thr to send one of my fren off..

fortunately PC let me go to my another fren's wake..

it was a tragic death for her...

no1 expected it..

well...shit happens..

u nv noe when the shit will hit u...

i finally gt my beret on 22nd July..

well...of cus happy abt it..

went thru quite alot..

it was tough, but it went easy cuz of the ppl ard me..

and now... just finished another phase of trg...

thx god for it....

no outfield for a couple of weeks...

glad ~

learned CQC....its a requirement..

FYI, CQC is Close Quarters Combat...

but the lesson is called ICCT...

i prefer to be named CQC cuz i played too much MGS my whole life..

now i face my challenge..

a girl who i like..

dunno if its a crush or mayb the ' one ' that im lookin for...

seriously i really dunno how..

its just the feeling..

aiya its always the god damn feeling lah...

fucked up ~

hais..

dun even have her contacts, how to date her ?

wanna get her number, but dunno how to open my mouth..

to me...

her smile really really,

its like sunshine on christmas day..

so bright, sunny, nice...

it would be great ~

well...

its all WISHFUL thinking...

enuff of it ~

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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summer of 09 ~

Sun, 06/14/2009 - 5:54PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 5 Views

Brothers in Arm ~


CHARLIE OC


"before i punch your face"
his fav line =X


my SEC COM


Platoon 8 wif CSM of my company, CHARLIE


bunk buddies....


Band of Brothers ?


zz... i look so fucking sloppy..sucks !


Forging Ahead ~

POP LOH !

these are the words i shouted on june 10 2009..

i will nv forget the moment..

took quite a few pics wif my buddies and platoon...

after everything, went back home..

b4 home was dinner @ AMK..

the next day, went to buy my long awaited PS 3 !

woot ~

bought 2 games, MGS 4 and COD 5..

their shop games too little to choose..

so choose those which i dun have..

the COD 5 quite hard to play..

for the MGS4, im impressed wif everything..

the storyline, the graphics.. everything..

excellent !

give a 5 /5 rating =D

2 thumbs up !

anyw i completed MGS 4 within 3 days..

not bad eh..

its more of cutscenes then gameplay..

the gameplay oso very unique..

eg the screen is split into half,

one half u are controller the char, the other half is a cutscene..

so its kinda messy...

not bad la..

i bought FIFA 08 and Street Fighter too...

borrowed DMC 4 and Dragonball from my fren..

now dunno which one to start playing ~.~

didnt took any pics of the ps3 yet..

will do it soon =)

sian...

thr goes the 4 days leave..

tonite have to book in again..

sian..

but on the brighter side..

all will be bookin out on tues nite =D

then off to KL !

woo cant wait..

shopping time xDD

oh yeah forgot to add on..

went to look for K on fri..

haha..

she say i slim =X

damn happy la xDDDD

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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nothing without your support ~

Sat, 06/06/2009 - 11:48PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 4 Views
i finally passed my IPPT test !

and im damn happy abt it !

after so many tests and trainings...

finally it had all put into use..

my 1st ippt..

chin up = 5

sit up = 40

SBJ = 189

2.4 = 12.18

lol..

crap results..

almost all fail ~.~

but now..

the last IPPT test b4 the end of the BMT

chin up = 10

sit up = 41

SBJ = 216 !

2.4km = 11.03mins

by the way..

my 2.4km timing is currently my personal best =)

the prev best timing was 11.27 min..

so u can say i improved by dropping it to 24 secs =D

thats so damn good..

was really over the moon abt it..

if it wasnt for her luck..

i tink i wont be able to pass..

so once again..

thx !

i did it all for u =)

anyw..

its just 3 MORE WORKING DAYS TO POP !

AND I AM SO HAPPY AH !

WOOT !

i cant wait man...

cant wait to POP and buy my fuckin ps3 !

GODLIKE LIAO LAH !

now we are all busy preparing for our graduation parade..

tiring..

booked out ard 11 todae..

cuz of the grad rehearsal...

then went to airport to eat BK...

cuz my bro sending his fren off..

to some place..

haha..

dunno whr..

then after that went home and slacked till ard 4 plus..

went MS meet bryan and eunice..

ate @ the foodcourt..

then walked ard suntec to buy presents for junie and zen..

then we headed our to vivo to look for felicia..

haha..

she is still pretty as ever xDD

then saw kiah seng working thr oso !

hahaha..

anyw he completed the ULTRA marathon at the adiddas sundown..

CONGRATS BRO !

84km is no joke...

they are working for Aviva..

dunno wat shit la...

then she say i lost alot of weight xDD

looool !

well i been hearing that quite alot of times liao..

and thats good man !

im gonna keep tis weight...

or even better...drop it down somemore !

then after that walked ard vivo for a little while more b4 we all headed home..

tired man...

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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stupid no limit ~

Sat, 05/23/2009 - 10:31PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 3 Views
been super super long since i last updated..

lazy to update..

was at field camp for the past 2 weeks...

and its hell...

TOTAL HELL !

woke up late on the 2nd day of outfield..

kana fucked upside down =.=

bo pian..

we deserve it =X

after the 9 days at tekong...

for the first time, everyone was so happy to be back at camp..

1st thing we did..

BATH !

omg ~

and its god damn shiok !

nth much after we got back to camp..

just mainly bring back our fitness...

means more PT -.-

booked out on the fri evening..

went home straight..

cant wait to see my family and hse..

missed them alot during field camp..

then at nite had supper at pig organ soup =D

todae woke up at 10..

went to eat carls jr at far east alone..

then home straight..

shortly after i reached home, guo zheng asked me go clubhse to do some weights..

so i go lor...

been quite some time since i last visited the clubhse...

well..

it looked the same xDD

do abit of weights..

then went over to my bro's gf hse to look for him..

watched the movie Night at the Museum 2..

its damn nice..

and funny..

alot better then the first...

i watched Wolverine and Star Trek too...

that was 3 weeks ago...

b4 i went field camp..

and its damn nice too...

tis year alot of GREAT movies..

Wolverine, i would give a 4 / 5..

Star Trek: 5 / 5

i nv liked star trek last time..

but after i watched the movie..

i liked it so much..

the special effects, the storyline...

well-written...

i watched star trek wif tsing hau, benji, bry and eunice...

quite a crowd eh ?

sian ~

tml booking in again....

well...

i just have to endure abit more...

endure so that i can endure even more after my POP...

and its just 12 more working days to POP..

how fast could that be ?

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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up and down this ever hill ~

Sat, 05/02/2009 - 4:26PM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 2 Views
fucked...

thr goes my long weekend ~

first it was RT trg on fri which spoilt my fri morning..

next is my guard duty on sun..

which means i have to book in tonite..

wtf....

but on the bright side..

i get to spend 2 days at home..

*smiles* ?

whatever ~

my fam shot last wk i got the company best shooter..

*gives proud face*

it was announced during RO....

lol...

then during the BTP..

didnt got marksman or company best shooter -.-

well...i dun give a shit..

i totally moodless now...

11th may field camp...to 19th...

GREAT !

confinement again..

hais..

fuck it ~

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~



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watch your front ~

Sun, 04/26/2009 - 1:46AM by PurePolaris 0 Comments - 14 Views
here i am...

back at wonderful home again =)

feels damn good to be home...

but i hate the feeling of going back camp..

hais ~

anyw..

last wk was a super super busy week..

not enuff slp =(

morning went route march..

shagged out ~

then we started our technical handling of our weapons..

new weapon..

very curious abt it..

cuz im fascinated wif guns and rifle....

still gt test somemore..

the platoon sgt was very strict on this...

scold this guy from his platoon...

right into his face, he screamed " fucking cb faggot PUA CB ! "

LOL !

combo siao ~

he is sick in the mind man ~.~

then we went for our shoot..

reach ard afternoon..

then reached camp at 0025...

sian half..

next morning still have to wake up early..

hais..

i feel very stress from army life..

i just need someone to help me wif this problems..

but it seems that thr is no one to help me wif that =(

i feel so bloated up wif my probs..

just someone to share my probs wif me..

someone that i could talk to..

thats all i need....

DO it wif style, or dun bother doing it ~